Welcome Home Wheaton!

Well, we have been home for about a week and a half now. I am sorry I have not posted an update in a while, but I just can't seem to tear myself away from my little guy! He is napping quietly at the moment, so I thought I would take the opportunity to update everyone on our first few days home. It was quite a homecoming! My mom had balloons out front and she even planted some Small Leaf Dixie Pixie Ivy in my much neglected window box in honor of our little wood nymph! The cats were anxiously awaiting our arrival. I was so relieved when they responded well. It was like Pussca, my Siamese, knew exactly what was going on. I had been worried that she would run and hide and be jealous of the baby, but instead she has taken on a protective role. It is like she knew all along that we were getting a new member of the family. Adam's dad and Karna had gone to Babies-R-Us and stocked us up on the essentials (diapers, wipes, the most adorable little preemie onesies ect). Since then we have just been settling into our little routine. So far, little Wheaton has been sleeping and eating really well. He had his first bath a few days ago and seemed to actually enjoy himself. Aside from sleeping, changing diapers, occasional tummy time, and breastfeeding, we have just been trying to snuggle with him as much as possible! Although he seems to have his days and nights confused, he is still adorable when he wants to party all night. We have had friends and family bringing by food, which has been wonderful. Trying to decide what to do for dinner has been a big challenge. It seems to take a bit too much brain power than what we currently have on reserve. My godparents brought over and amazing spread on Sunday night night which included this beautiful dessert that was almost too beautiful too eat, but we managed. My mom has also provided several meals which we are still chowing down on. I guess my post-baby diet will have to wait until Adam and I are back to fending for ourselves for meals. We have been so spoiled, I don't know what we will do! Overall the transition home has been very smooth. I am loving hanging out all day with my little man. There are still many times where the whole thing just seems surreal. During the lucid moments in between my sleep deprived states of consciousness, I just think how amazing this is and I feel so very blessed.

Despite all of the chaos leading up to our return home, Mr. Wheaton appears to be feeling very comfortable already!

More pictures!!!!!!

Snuggle time with Mom and Pussca.

Snuggle time with Dad and Pussca.

Snuggle time with Mimi.

Snuggle time with Pussca.

Just Chillin.

Tummy time.

Our little elf!

Here is little Wheaton's first professional photo. There is this cart that goes around the hospital and to take pictures of your new baby. I LOVE this photo! We think he looks like a little elf or wood nymph.

More pictures!!!!!!

I have just started to write some more posts, but I know that people really want to see more pictures, so here are a few of my favorites: Poor Wheaton was hooked up to monitors and an IV for the first few days in the NICU.
We finally got to take have him in our room on Saturday night! Here are my guys resting after a long day.I cannot find the words to describe this feeling without bursting into tears. Any distance I had from my emotions disappeared the moment I held him safely in my arms.

Looking very cozy during some snuggle time with Mimi (my mom).........................and Papa (my dad). Wheaton enjoying his first snuggle with Auntie Colby (my sissy). Adam's dad was able to be in town for the occasion. Here he is checking out Wheaton's grip. Adam's sister Karna surprised us with a visit from Colorado. She and Grampy helped out by getting things ready at the house. We are so lucky to have such supportive families!

I am planning to do some more post over the next couple of days as time permits. We are so happy to finally have our little guy home. He had his first doctor's appointment today. He is working hard and has gained weight like a champ. We are so proud of him already!

He's Here!

We are so happy to share the news that Adam Wheaton Caldwell is here and doing awesome! Here he is just a few hours after his birth on 6/17/08 at 6:21pm. He weighed in at 5 pounds and 14 ounces and was 19 and 1/2 inches. He is a very strong boy and is doing so well. We are so proud of him. At 34 weeks we had to go to the NICU, but he was breathing well and did not require any oxygen. We don't yet know how long he will have to be there; it all depends on how he well he eats. He did really well today, so hopefully it won't be too long.

We have had many visitors and phone calls. Between that, hospital business, and trying to use the breast pump every two hours this is literally the first chance I have had to post some pictures of our little guy. I plan to share some about the labor in a different post, as I am just too exhausted right now. For now I will just focus on the really fun stuff: PICTURES:

He had a bit of a cone head at first, but it's almost gone today!
So proud!
I think he is going to have Adam's curls!

I will try to post again soon, but now I am going to try and get some sleep before another feeding. I will just say that the staff here has been amazing and we are doing really well. I had an awesome nurse during labor. I did not need a c-section and was able to deliver naturally with the help of the best birth partner in the world, my wonderful husband, Adam. He was amazing. I could not have gotten through it without him. I look forward to sharing more about the birth later when I am feeling more coherent. Thank you all for your support!

Blair and Wheaton Caldwell

Update-Wednesday, July 16

Hello everyone-
I just wanted to give everyone one final update before the big day. We are all still doing just fine, just trying to brace ourselves for tomorrow. Adam and I both slept very well last night. I sent him home to get one last quiet night in his own bed. I was pretty much in an Ambien induced bliss all night. I barely woke up for then nursse to hook up my IV at 4:00am. It was seriously the best night sleep I have had in months. Today has been fairly quiet and given me a chance to make a few more phone calls and finish tying up some loose ends at work. I met with the Lactation Consultant today and she was very encouraging about our situation. She said they will have a breast pump waiting in the delivery room for me to start pumping as soon as possible after delivery. She said they will be there to help with the pumping and keep me on the best schedule to get my milk to come in. She was very encouraging about babies this age being able to latch on and breast feed, even if a c-section is required. She said they will be there to help facilitate if there are problems. I have heard wonderful things about the Lactation Consultants here and I am very determined to breastfeed, so hopefully it will work out. I am just planning for the best. She left some information for me to read. I felt very encouraged after her visit.

I think some of my anal retentive neuroses actually worked in our favor for once. We are done with our classes, the nursery is in good shape, I have researched my work leave situation as much as possible, and thanks to family and friends, all of the new born essentials have been gathered over the past couple of days. Organizing the Tupperware will have to wait. I have gotten some adorable baby gifts already and had a shower at work, but it looks like the real guest of honor will be able to attend my other shower scheduled for next month. It may work out well, I may be able to register for a few more things after I have had a little experience. I never got a chance to post the registry blog (I started it over the weekend), but I found registering to be very challenging; trying to figure out what we really need and when. I have gotten some great advice from friends and family who are mommy's (special shout out to Delaney who has been my most utilized resource over the past 8 months!). As our OB doctor friend has said, "As long as you have some diapers, a place for him to sleep, and boobs, you are in good shape". So, as long as my boobs cooperate, we are set for now.

We will be heading up to the Labor and Delivery unit early in the morning (like 5:30) to start the process. I will get a pitocin IV and then it's just a waiting game. I have no idea how long it will take, it just all depends on how the baby and I do. We have had a relatively quiet night tonight as we are trying to get some rest. We may not have that opportunity again for awhile after tomorrow!

My family and friends have been so great. My room is well-stocked with goodies. I have all my favorites. I have had frozen yogurt pretty much everyday. My brother brought me a Wasabi Wrap from Palani Drive and some hummus and pita. My sister gave me a pedicure yesterday, which was awesome. I was appalled after catching a glimpse of my toes when my feet were in the stirrups on Monday, but Colby fixed me right up. I can't even list everyone, plus I probably shouldn't post a bunch of names on the Internet without their permission. Thanks to you all, you know who you are.

This may likely be my last post for a while. I don't know if my next room will have Wi-Fi, but we will be sure to do what we can to keep everyone posted. Please keep us in your thoughts tomorrow as we welcome Baby C into the world. Wow, that is just surreal. We love you all and thank for all the support!

Blair, Adam, and Baby C

Update- Tuesday, July 15

Well, I just spent about an hour writing a post and then lost Internet connection as well as my post. This one may be a bit shorter, but here we go.

My little bubble of feeling "strangely calm" was burst early this morning with a visit from one of the NICU doctors. Adam and I were just waking up when she came in and proceeded to tell us just about every horrible possible scenario that can occur in the world of premature babies. She started her information session by telling us about President Kennedy's 34 week premature baby who died and even though it was 45 years ago, it happened. I guess her point wasthat is can still happen. I have no idea why anyone would choose to begin this kind of speech in this manner because I barley heard another word she said. My mind felt like it was on overdrive trying to process each horrible sentence. I heard various unsettling words that I don't even want to type, but it was all very scary. I understand that the NICU docs are probably required by law to tell us all of these possibilities, but her delivery could certainly use some work. I had not allowed any of these thoughts to enter my mind. I had been worrying about what kind of labor I would have and whether or not Baby C will have the coordination to breastfeed. These other scenarios had not even been on my radar. Dr. Doom seemed be gone as fast a she appeared leaving Adam and I just staring at each other, shell shocked and trying to process of this information. I immediately tried to protect my crumbling wall of calm. "I am sure everyone in this unit has to get that same speech", I scrambled. "She didn't even have my chart. They must just tell everyone the same thing, regardless of their personal risk". That is about as far as I got with by intellectualization before bursting into tears. I finally lost it. Adam just climbed into the bed with me and held me as days of fear and anxiety poured out.

Luckily, my OB came by about an hour later and really helped to ease our minds. She assured us of the rarity of most of the risks and reminded us of his healthy size and and strong vitals. She said there is a reason the 34 weeks is our cut off point for inducing in these situations, because most of them do fine. Baby C may not even have to go to the NICU. We have also had friends sharing inspiring stories about people they know who have had premature babies who were just fine and are thriving now. Several personal friends who are also doctors (even one who is a very well respected OB here) have also been very reassuring about our situation. I feel like I am in very good hands. Even though my birth plan has changed enormously, all I want is for him to be OK and I know we are in the right place. We are still going to try for a vaginal delivery, but who knows what will happen tomorrow. Having him and getting him healthy and safe is all I care about right now.

I would like to talk moment to thank everyone who has e-mailed, called, posted on my blog, come to visit, and kept us in your thoughts and prayers. Adam and I are overwhelmed by all of the support we have received. We feel incredibility loved and supported. I believe this is the reason we have been able to maintain any semblance of calm as we anticipate the next couple of days. I plan to try and respond to e-mails as I can. Although it was wonderful and an amazing distraction, we have had so many visitors and phone calls, I have had little time for any other communication. Tomorrow may be a bit calmer as we prepare for the big day. Just know, even if I haven't have a chance to respond, I have been reading the e-mails and posts and they have been an amazing source of strength. I plan to do another post tomorrow, but after that, it may be a while before I have a chance. We will do the best we can to keep everyone posted as your support has been so precious.

Thank you all so much. Adam, baby, and I feel truly blessed.

P.S. I hope there are not too many misspellings in the post. The nurse gave me an Ambien not too long ago............ good stuff.

Update

Well, today was a very busy day. Adam, baby, and I are still at St. Mary's. We all spent a restless night in the labor and delivery unit. The nurses nicknamed the baby "wild man" because he kept moving around and they would have to come in every twenty minutes and adjust the fetal monitor. Although it is always reassuring to hear movement, it was not conducive to getting much sleep. In addition to that, we would hear the occasional bloodcurdling scream of a woman in labor. YIKES!!!! Plus, I was just anxious to get some more information, my mind just couldn't shut off despite my exhaustion. Going to the bathroom, which also seemed to occur around every twenty minutes, was also quite an ordeal. I had to unplug the monitors, and the IV and drag the the IV with me to the bathroom while trying not to bump into anything and wake up Adam. The worst was when I would let myself start to worry about my baby and what would happen in the days to come.

We did get some more information today. I had an ultrasound earlier and got to see the little guy again which was such a relief! He was sucking on his hand and he had one foot up by his head. He looks very crowded in there, it's no wonder he wants out! He is facing head down (what a good boy). It's very hard to tell what he really looks like, but I really think his profile looks like Adam. The ultrasound indicated that the fluid levels were good which was also a big relief. He weighs in at a whopping 5.7 pounds (I knew babycenter.com was off a pound or two). Although everything looked great, the ultrasound alone was not enough to determine if my amniotic sac had a small tear or leak, so I was examined by my OB who could tell pretty quickly that I am indeed leaking amniotic fluid. Apparently, anytime after 34 weeks, if there is even a tiny hole in the amniotic sac, the risk of infection to the fetus is greater than the risks associated with a pre-mature baby at this age. So, it looks like we are having a baby on Thursday!!!!!!!!!

They are giving me some steroids right now to help accelerate baby's lung growth. After two doses of the steroids, one today and one tomorrow, they will induce labor with pitocin. The plan is still for a vaginal delivery; however my OB warned me that there is a chance that I could then go into labor but not dilate. The contractions brought on by the pitocin are apparently very strong and can only go on for so long before putting the baby in distress at which point I would have to have a c-section. I am hoping that doesn't happen, but right now I am just praying that he is ok, however he comes into the world.

Physically, I am feeling fine. Emotionally, I think there is some switch in my brain that has turned off, or maybe on, but whatever it is it's holding me together. It may just be a defence mechanism; maybe my brain knows, on some level, that I cannot fall apart right now. I have to hold it together. Like it's telling me, "Do not open that emotional door just yet". Part of it may just be being in the hospital and feeling safe. I had several mini-breakdowns over the weekend when I was so unsure of what was going on and what I should do. Whatever it is, I feel strangely calm.

My amazing friends, family, and of course husband probably play the biggest part of all. Everyone has been so supportive with visits, phone calls, and e-mails. My mom went to Baby's R Us and bought the travel system and co-sleeper we hadn't gotten yet. My mom and dad both came to the ultrasound today. Adam has been amazing getting things settled here and at home. He is totally holding it together too. I am such a lucky girl!

For me, since the very beginning, being pregnant has such an exercise in letting go. There is really only so much planning you can do. I suppose is must be some sort of crash course to try and prepare you for parenthood, which I can only imagine must be the most delicate balance of holding on and letting go. Just thinking about it makes me want to hug both my parents and hang on for a while. OK, there's some emotion, and my cue to sign off for the night. We are in a new room (off the labor and delivery ward) which is much more comfortable than our previous accommodations. I am no longer hooked up to a continuous IV and monitor, it is very quiet, and the bed is much more comfortable. Hopefully, we will get some quality sleep tonight.

Thank you all again for all of the support. We will keep you posted as we can.

Blair, Adam, and Baby C.

34 Weeks!

Well, this weekend has brought on some excitement. On Friday evening after work I noticed some possible signs of pre-labor (WARNING: those with weak stomachs may want to reconsider reading on. For those of you brave souls who choose to keep reading, consider yourselves warned). Anyway, I noticed some symptoms of pre-labor that I remembered learning about in Lamaze class (it appeared that I was loosing my mucus plug....hey, I warned you). Adam remembered from class that this can happen right before labor begins, or a couple weeks before. Either way it was alarming to us since my due date is still over a month away. I immediately went into damage control mode. Will I be put on bed rest so that I don't go into labor early? Will I be able to convince my job to let me work from home so that I won't have to start my leave yet? I won't be covered under FMLA until October 1, so we will have to pay our full insurance premiums from the time I go out until the first of October (I will elaborate about that atrocity during a separate post). I just kept thinking of all of the things I still have left to do. I haven't organized the medicine cabinet or the drawers in the kitchen. We don't have a car seat! After I settled down a little, knowing that I have been blessed with family and friends to help me with all of the above, I just started worrying about the baby. I decided to call the on-call doctor to check in. She said that everything was probably fine; it did sound like the mucus plug, but without another symptoms, I shouldn't need to worry. She advised me to call if anything changed. By Saturday morning there was a slight change which included some bloody show. I called again. I got a different on-call doctor. He assured me that women can loose the mucus plug (which often includes bloody show) anywhere from the day of to four weeks before labor. Given that it is not necessarily a good predictor of labor and since my pregnancy has been normal so far, he told me I probably had nothing to worry about, but to call if anything changed (if my water broke or if I start having contractions). I felt much better after the conversation and decided to continue on with my day's to-do list. I was on my way to Target and reminded myself what my awesome Lamaze instructor told me which was "It's every woman's fear that her water will break while is shopping in Ukrop's or Target. Please resist the impulse to rush to the paper towel aisle and try to clean it up. Just leave your cart and tell someone in customer service, "clean up on isle 12" as you walk out the door". With that plan in mind, I proceeded with my errands. As I was squatting down to reach for some baby laundry detergent, I started to feel a little something "down there", nothing like the gush of fluid you may envision when picturing a woman's water breaking, but something wet none the less. I reminded myself that the doctor said I had nothing to worry about and went about my day. I figured maybe the baby was just hanging out on my bladder and causing some leakage. As the day went on it continued and then the clear fluid seemed to turn a pinkish color. I decided to call the on-call doctor again Sunday morning to inform him of the change. He told me to come on in to the hospital and he would check it out.

They put me on a fetal monitor and the baby's heart rate was good. What a relief! Then they did a litmus test on the fluid and it turns out it was indeed amniotic fluid. The doctor said that since it seems to be leaking out slowly, that it is likely a tear in the amniotic sac. He said that when this happens sometimes it will heal on it's own and sometimes it will continue to leak and cause a woman to go into labor. He admitted me to the hospital to monitor me and the baby and to administer an antibiotic, as one of the concerns with any type of rupture in the membrane there is an increase in risk of infection to the fetus. I am scheduled for an ultrasound tomorrow to check size, position, and fluid levels. So at this point it is just a waiting game. If the fluid stops leaking, I may be able to go home in a couple of days. If it doesn't I could go into labor early. I am hoping Baby C's apparently large size may mean that my due date is a little off, so that if I do go into labor soon we would be closer to the full-term 37 week mark.

Although it is difficult being stuck in the bed, I am reassured by the sound of his heart beating on the monitor beside me. Although I can't feel a thing, the nurse just informed me that the monitor on my uterus indicates that I am having contractions. Since I don't feel anything, she said they are most likely Braxton Hicks, which is good since we would like the little guy to stay in there a little longer. I feel surprisingly calm considering the circumstances and my usual neurotic anxiety. I feel safe being here and supported by loved ones. I am not in any pain and just trying not to think of that that I haven't vacuumed the house in weeks. That's what Molly Maids is for. Maybe I'll call them tomorrow.......just in case. I think it is these weird ideas/plans that help me to relax.

I have had a few visitors already and several phone call from friends and family. It warms my heart that I have such caring friends and family. I was lucky enough to get a room with Wi-Fi, so that I can maybe do some last minute shopping, check my e-mail, and maybe even post the occasional update. Thanks for checking in and I will do my best to keep you posted.
Blair and Baby C

33 Weeks!

So here we are at 33 weeks. I had a doctor's appointment this past week and she said that "he still feels big" and said that I am "all belly" which I didn't really understand at first because I know my body has expanded in many other places. After measuring by belly she decided to schedule an ultrasound for my next visit to "check his size and position". Apparently after you hit 20 weeks or so, if you measure your belly in centimeters (from the top of your pupil bone to the top of your belly), the number you get should be the same (or close to) the number of weeks you are. Theoretically, this means that my belly should be measuring somewhere around 33 centimeters. What is my actual measurement you ask? Between 39 and 40!!!!!! Now, I sort of understand now what the doctor meant when she said I am "all belly" when she felt it. I guess if you are retaining a lot of fluid or carry extra body fat in that area, the measurements can be less accurate. Apparently, I am not retaining much fluid. He is either just going to be a big baby, or maybe my due dated is off. I guess we will just have to wait and see. According to babycenter.com, "This week your baby weighs a little over 4 pounds (heft a pineapple) and has passed the 17-inch mark". I take this information with a grain of salt.

Things are really coming along in all of baby preparations. Adam and I will finish up with the last of our classes this week with Infant CPR. I must admit I will miss our evenings in class together (and eating frozen yogurt from the hospital cafeteria). The nursery is really coming together. My parents bought us an awesome glider chair. It has not arrived yet, but I think it is going to look super cute. We are painting my old armoire. It was an antique when my parents bought it for me when I was a baby. It has my name and birth date custom painted on the door with a tripped out 70's looking flower. I love it and didn't want to paint over the design, but it really wouldn't work well with the rest of the nursery decor. Plus I don't think baby's furniture should have my name on it, though perhaps years from now he will think it's cool. Anyway, I found a place that can cover the arimoire door with a mirror and preserve the painting (you can see part of the armoire in the picture to the right).
As you can also see, Sashi has been very useful in helping me practice using the baby sling. Although, she would ever admit to it, I think she really enjoys it. I can't wait to hold a real baby in it, my baby. Wow, that's really overwhelming. WARNING, hormone alert! I guess I better sign off. Talk to you all soon!